Thursday, 8 February 2018

Bye Vaginismus!

Hello my lovelies.

Grab a tissue, this might get emosh...  This is going to be my final post on Hey Vaginismus!

I never, EVER believed I would be writing this, but I had sex yesterday.  Actual penetrative sex with my husband, and it was only a tiny bit sore.  I am completely mindblown and overwhelmed... I am sure you'll agree that vaginismus-brain is good at making you feel like you're a total failure.  It was the biggest surprise of my life when I realised that I had it in me to win this fight.  I'm not silly- I know there's still a journey ahead, and it might not be plain sailing.  But I now know for sure that a penis can go inside my vagina.  WOW.

So at the ripe old age of 32, I 'lost my virginity' and, according to my therapist, don't have vaginismus any more. WHO EVEN AM I?

Well, let me tell you who I am.

I am the co-founder of The Vaginismus Network.  Alongside my friend Lisa, who first made contact with me after reading Hey Vaginismus!, we have set up a network with the aims of connecting up women with vaginismus to support one another, cheer each other on, remind each other to dilate and remove the aching, horrible loneliness that goes hand in hand with vaginismus.  My main aim when I started writing this blog was to find a vaginismus friend.  Actually being able to do this has changed my life and my perspective on this condition.  There are so many of us out there.  And most of us are not talking to anyone about what's going on, or how it feels.  Find yourself a vaginismus friend.  It is vital.

So, The Vaginismus Network is here.  It's still a baby, and we're still working out exactly what we can achieve and offer.  Our first meet up will be held in London, in April.   Please come if you can.

I will leave Hey Vaginismus! online, so that the posts are still available to read.  However, I won't be updating the blog or using the Hey Vag email.  If you would like to stay in touch though, you can find me at:


That's that.  Hey Vaginismus! is no more.  Vaginismus is no more.  But I spent enough time with it to know that some serious work needs to be done in educating people about this condition, and enabling women to easily find others in the same boat. I am so, so passionate about this.  Vaginismus might be on its way out for me, but I will always be a women that has suffered from it.  That will never go away.  And I'll do my best to make sure that other women don't have the same lonely, isolating journey I had before starting this blog.

Hey Vaginismus?  Bye Vaginismus x x x