Monday, 16 January 2017

Dilator Live Blog

So, after yet another dilator break, I decided to get them out tonight and get inserting.

I really can't write another post about starting again after a break.  Avid readers of the blog will know there are MILLIONS of those. I am the queen of stopping and starting.  Mainly stopping.  But tonight I'm starting.  Again.

However, I thought it might be a whole ton of fun to live blog my way through dilators.  Now, just to remind you, the biggest I have inserted is D3 (which is actually the 4th one in my kit. Just to keep you on your toes...)  I have not inserted dilators for a while, so not expecting this one to go in tonight but you never know... maybe the pressure of a live blog will work magic on my vag.

So here we go:

19:33- Lubed up D0 and located my vagina.  Dilator 0 slides in with relative ease.  It's a tiny bit sore getting past the good old PC muscle (muscles? Is there more than one? Who knows.)  But it's in.  That was fine.  I am going to sit with it inside me for a little while.

19:34- Urgh, kind of need to pee.  Must remember to pee before dilating next time.  WHICH WILL BE TOMORROW OBVS. LOLZ.

19:38- D0 still inside.  Feeling fine.  Will take it out now... Yuck. I really don't enjoy the feeling of a dilator coming out.  OK, time to lube up D1 and insert...

19:39- Ok, got the tip in the right place... but this isn't wanting to go in.  Ouch. STOP HURTING ME. Bastard.  It actually burns.  BIG SIGH WHILE I REMEMBER THE GOOD OLD DAYS WHEN D1 WAS EASY... CURSE MYSELF FOR LEAVING IT SUCH A LONG TIME

19:41- Paused for some deep breaths.  It is now inside. Always amazed how it eventually stops hurting after a certain point (The muscle/ muscles).  REALLY NEED TO PEE NOW. But I am not moving.

19:42- Feel a bit guilty.  Husband changed the bed sheets earlier and I've just spilled lube absolutely everywhere.  SORRY DEAR.  Luckily it's water based, so I guess it'll just dry?

19:43- I need to cough.  If I cough, will the dilator fall out? Just coughed.  It stayed in. Thanks, ridiculously tight vagina! Couldn't really face trying to insert that again...

19:44- This isn't very comfortable. I can feel my vagina spasming. One's fanny is not amused.

19:45- Took it out and slopped a bit more lube on.  Re-inserted it.  It slid in much more easily this time, with less pain.  Can't decide whether to attempt D2.  Probably shouldn't but I am actually quite enjoying this live blogging... CONFLICTED.

19:46- D1 still inside.  Spasming has now stopped.  Still need a pee.

19:49- Ok, I'm doing it. I'm going to try and insert D2.  Will be an ocean of calm, even if it doesn't remotely go in.

19:50- Fuck- forgot how big this one is...

19:51- OK the tip is in the right place... Just relaxing the muscles and will try and give it a wee push


19:53: I'd say about a third of it is in. It doesn't hurt at all.  But it's just not moving any further.  ANNOYING

19:58- D2 definitely not happening tonight.  And I REALLY have to pee.  Already spilled half a bottle of lube over the freshly changed bed.  Don't want to add any unsavoury body fluids to the mix.  All in all, not a bad attempt at dilating, given that I haven't done it in actual weeks.

I have no idea if this is actually a good blog post, or the ramblings of an idiot. Do let me know what you think!


1 comment:

  1. Good post! You just described a typical dilation session so it is not rambling at all. One little advice, to spread a soft, medium sized towel or blanket beneath you before each session to keep your sheets clean ;)